Monday, January 9, 2012

Dear Aaron,

I got to go home for Christmas a whole week before the actual holiday!  The first thing on my agenda was to go and see your headstone.  I'd been hearing about it from everybody and I couldn't wait to go visit it.  We landed in SLC Friday night and on Saturday morning I got to go to the cemetery to see it for myself.  I was actually really surprised.
Now, I wasn't surprised at how incredible the headstone was...nope, not at all.  I remember your super-rad chrome-ish looking casket and all I could think about is that if you had known ahead of time, you would have chosen the same thing.  As I looked at your headstone I was super surprised because I didn't know how much it would remind me of you.  It reminded me of you so much that I cried uncontrollably.  I sat there on the frozen ground, in indian style, just looking at it (and noticing that I could see my reflection in it...kinda).  Something about it spoke so much of you and it's amazing.  

While I was there I also got to tell you that I'm going to have a baby but the thought came to me that you already knew and I'm also pretty sure you've already become acquainted with the little person and that made me cry even harder.  Nevertheless, it was really therapeutic for me to sit there and tell you myself.

By this point, I started getting a little embarrassed because I was like completely out of control and there were other people not very far away visiting one of their loved ones.  We'll blame my lack of emotional control on this pregnancy.  Yikes.  Anyway, the moral of the story is that I have never seen another headstone that speaks about the person so much and I think it needed to be that way because we need to remember, on a regular basis, what you meant to us and what you were really like.

And I proceeded to ugly cry all the way home.

Love, Me

P.S. We'll visit again soon...after the baby is born...and I'll bring it to that shady place under the tree where your body rests and I'll probably ugly don't watch.


  1. Annie, thanks for sharing! You are an incredible example of loving someone regardless of their mistakes or weakness. I didn't know Aaron very well but from your posts I can tell that he was really great. Your posts about Aaron have showed me how to love as Christ loves. I'm incredibly blessed to have you as a friend! I hope all is well with you, the baby, and Javi. May our paths cross soon!

  2. Annalece, my sister just called me and told me I had to read your latest post about Aaron's headstone. I am so glad I did. I (like everyone in my family) miss Aaron everyday. I have a hard time looking at pictures of him because there are so many memories associated with pictures. My parents specifically chose a picture of him for the front that looked like "him." As you probably can tell, he is obviously younger in the photo than when he was when he died. For us this photo signifies a happy time...the Aaron we have so many memories associated with. And of course football...he loved everything about that game. I could cry everyday because I miss my brother so much! But I know he is in a better place and he doesn't want us to be sad. Josh (my husband) designed Aaron's headstone and my dad really wanted it to remind him of Aaron and I know they succeeded.

    I don't know if anyone ever told you, but Aaron thought a lot of you. My dad often teased him of having a crush on you (and Gavin :)). He knew he wasn't musically talented enough to marry into the Boothe family, but he wanted to marry someone like you.

    Thanks so much for you post! -Melissa Lee