I wish there was a scratch and sniff widget for the bloggy. If there was, I would share with you all the horrible fragrance we've been smelling for the past two months. A quick whiff would help you to understand why we just completed our THIRD move in SIX months.
It goes like this:
We walk into our new apartment and take a deep breath. Is that cigarette smoke or carpet cleaner? We talked ourselves into believing it was just carpet cleaner especially since the girls who sold us our lease ASSURED the cranky pregnant lady that there was no one around who smoked and that it would not be a problem at all despite the fact that we were living in a "smoking building".
Fast forward the next two months of spending loads of money on air fresheners, purifiers, humidifiers, odor eaters, etc. My faith in those fantastic febreeze commercials is diminished. The Bed Bath and Beyond odor eaters that are GUARANTEED don't work either and the water in my humidifier is black. Ash has started accumulating on the walls and the Mister and Lady have had permanent sore throats for two months.
We share vents with our upstairs neighbors.
We love them.
They smoke like trains.
I'm talking, NON STOP all day long.
I'm paying HOW MUCH to develop lung cancer?!?
Cranky pregnant lady waddles over to the leasing office to ask when we can move into a non-smoking building. The girls tell prego that it will be a $150 transfer fee. Prego reminds them that they assured her upon move in that this would not be an issue. Prego leaves upset and the manager calls minutes later telling her that the fee will be waived and we can move on March 1st.
Last weekend was the big move...directly across the courtyard. Easiest move in the history of the world. Still annoying, but no U-Haul's or boxes involved.
This girl is staying RIGHT HERE for as long as she can manage because moving again sounds like the worst idea in the world.
This whole experience reminded me of a poster my uncles used to have hanging in the music store. It looked like this:
Thank you very much but the Mister, Lady, and Little Lady will not be contracting lung cancer any time soon. To all of you who like lung cancer and like to give it to yourself I say "good on ya".